These days it's difficult not to feel down and discouraged. This is true of adults as well as young people.
Dad, how do you cope with the stormy social climate today, and how do you help your teenagers navigate the prevailing winds of hostility? The ever-depressing news, the incivility among people, the violence around the globe—all are disturbing.
A man of peace
“Won't You Be My Neighbor?” is a 2018 American documentary film directed by Morgan Neville about the life and guiding philosophy of Fred Rogers, the host and creator of “Mister Rogers' Neighborhood” on television. Mr. Rogers was like a soft pillow to many youngsters. We dare say he provided solace to grown-ups as well. He was a man of peace. Through his TV program, he taught the virtues of kindness, generosity and fair play. He broached subjects like bullying, bigotry, love and divorce. Mr. Rogers always had an appropriate response to tragedy.
After 9-11, however, the degree of hatred toward complete strangers caused even Fred Rogers to fall into the doldrums. He became quiet. His face reflected disbelief. For a time, Mr. Rogers was at a loss for words.
Yet, people expected him to respond, to make it all make sense, especially to children and adolescents. When they asked him to help his young audience understand why such a horrible thing had happened—a disaster that killed nearly 3,000 innocent people—his eventual response was calm and deliberate.
Watch the helpers
Mr. Rogers told his viewers to turn their thoughts to those who helped. We have to search for any daylight in this heap of twisted steel and ash, he said. We must look for the helpers, the rescuers, the first responders who risked their lives to preserve life. We have to celebrate the basic human good that emerged through the inexplicable evil.
It does not seem to be a happy world today. Mr. Rogers was one of the last real role models. He was able to pierce through the gloom. It wasn't that he ignored the problems or wished them away. Instead, he confronted them with a little light in the darkness.
Those who lessen the burden for others
Dad, when you are with your children in a park or store or just riding in the car, help them to look for helpers—those people who lighten the burden for others. Point out the pre-school teacher who is leading a line of children across the street. Notice the person who's helping someone on the bus. How about the workers repairing potholes in the street or the young person who is sharing an umbrella with a stranger?
Bad behavior is like a magnet. Our attention is pulled toward the fight at school, the latest crime, or two people angrily shouting at each other on the sidewalk. Dad, encourage your children to watch the person who tries to break up the fight or calm the tempers of the shouters. Look for the helpers. And suggest to your sons and daughters to model that behavior.
